Thinking in Blog Status

I have begun to think in Blog mode. I find myself narrating situations Í´m in and trying to precisely remember certain events and details to better replicate in word form for this updating forum. Sometimes it goes well. Other times, however, I look like a fool having a conversation in my head...maybe a drunk person. This is the reason for such a story...

As it may well be aware, I am no stranger to the world of liquor. Perhaps there was a point in my life where I was referred to as a ¨Party Animal¨ or something of the likes. Since graduating college, my ways have slowed some and I no longer have the drink-my-face-off-till-I-vomit, though process, rather I am able to enjoy a cocktail here and there. (Please don´t misunderstand me, there are still times when I do drink my face off and it is possible that there is some vomiting, but it is no longer the goal of an evening, as in Freshman-mid Junior year of college).

Also, since I have ¨matured,¨ I have not become a liquor snob either. I have had my fair share of Crystal Palace and Popov Vodka, I believe my main food group in those hazy years of college was Keystone Light and Natty Ice, and I still have ABSOLUTELY NO PROBLEM with boxed wine. I just find that these days, I prefer when taking a shot of booze, that I shouldn´t need to plug my nose in hopes that it will go down smoother.

I´m also not a wine snob. Sure, I have taken a wine class or two, and I work (worked) in a restaurant that had a fabulous wine selection, but pretty much it comes down to the simple basics. I like the way it tastes. Sometime I try and stick with the ¨red with meat and white with fish,¨ but in the end, I really just want to drink wine, regardless of the food. I don´t know what varietal you pair with crackers, but I´ll probably drink it.

This all being said, I think it´s fair to say that splitting a bottle of wine between 2 people doesn´t make anyone a lush. And I think MANY people would agree that it´s very easy to finish a bottle of wine solo and not be inebriated. If anything, at a slow pace, a bottle of vino can be finished in 4 days, (VERY SLOW PACE) if say a person had one glass every night. Well, that´s just what I did the other day, purchased a delicious Malbec and worked it slow. When it was finished, I was called an Alcoholic. Andrea said that I consumed it so fast. It was meant to be light hearted, and almost funny. My thoughts on me being an alcoholic differ somewhat... I thought f saying something like, ¨What? But you haven´t even seen me go to town yet...wait until you at least see my crazy lazy eyes and hear my slurred speech before you come to that conclusion.¨ I thought it was funny. It got even funnier as the week continued.

A woman I work with was given a bottle of wine. She told my host mother to give it to me because She doesn´t drink the stuff. (How she knows I like wine, who cares. She is a saint). I was taking my Saturday easily pool side...(though the pool was actually drained of water, so technically, I was just hole side) reading my book, and soaking up the sun. Andrieta comes out to the patio and asks me if I would like to drink wine with her. This is unusual, as she doesn´t really like wine, and doesn´t really drink much, especially when it is still daylight. Drinking with the sun, however, is one of my favorite pass times. You can imagine my shock.
My response...(translated into English for your reading pleasure)
¨What? Are you kidding? Please never seriously ask me that again. I always want to drink wine. And I always want to drink wine in the afternoon, sitting outside. What am I doing right now? Yes, sitting outside...and it´s afternoon...let´s make it complete, bring the wine!¨

Well, she brought the wine. It turned out to be rather delicious. Sparkling wine. Not quite champagne status, but white wine with bubbles...if that makes ANY sense. We start sipping and having a merry time. About 3/4 through her glass, she gets up and leaves mid conversation. Weird. Was it something I said? Did I have BO? I couldn´t figure it out. About a minute later she returns (semi colon) I am just about finished with my glass... she has no glass in her hands. She claims it was too fuzzy (not fizzy, fuzzy) and gave it to her mom. Well, I though it was just fuzzy enough, so she offered me some more. Decline I did not, and as she poured my second divine glass, she giggles and calls me an alcoholic. I pay no attention to her and those ridiculous, outlandish statements. (Off with her head).
I realized she gave a little stumble while walking inside. I asked her if she was okay, she claimed the wine hit her a little...all 7 1/2 sips...silly shenanigans.

As we were hanging out, the mom opened the fridge. She immediately pulls out the wine (Easily I could have terminated the remaining liquid, but I suppose I wanted it to appear that I don´t always finish a bottle in one sitting) and laughingly asks where all the wine went. I just smiled, doing math in my head. (4 glasses to a bottle...minus the 3 poured today...leaves about one glass left in the bottle...which is less than half) It all added up, I didn´t see the problem. She looked and said, something along the lines of ¨haha, Courtney drinks a lot of wine, she´s an alcoholic...wino.¨ I got nervous, thinking that they were really starting to think I had a problem. I wanted to explain that 2 glasses was really nothing. It all became clear to me when she told me that it would take her a year to finish a bottle of wine. WHAT?!? A YEAR? I think even the highly preservative injected boxed wine goes bad after a few months. No wonder you don´t like wine, you are usually drinking vinegar!

This enraged me, and I tried to explain how wine went bad after being opened. You have to drink it. The wine wants to be drank, let it fulfill it´s destiny. It´s like putting a toy on the shelf and never playing with it again. How sad. We all saw Toy Story 2, drink the wine!!! Even 4 days is pushing it. It´s my opinion that it should all be consumed in one sitting, staining your teeth and sometimes your carpet, but a year...Oh no. It is clear to me why it seems that I have a problem.

After this informative conversation, I started to replay in my head the Blog format of how I wanted to phrase such a topic. I suppose I looked silly, because Andrieta asked me, ¨what are you doing, are you drunk?¨

...Thus, the vicious circle of thinking and Blogging.